When you get into people’s heads, it does not matter whether you are talking with high-level executives, stock-boys, painters, psychologists, teachers, students or professional athletes the challenges are always the same. We question ourselves, we second-guess ourselves, and we do not have as much confidence in ourselves as others seem to have. Fascinating, isn’t it? It is as if we are all born with the same tape player imbedded in our heads and we go through life pushing rewind then stop, rewind then stop, rewind then stop…
Want an analogy that can take you from despair to positive mindset in an instant?
Our default is typically to go the negative of any situation. That is why we are always asking ourselves “what if?” It is why we are always getting in our own way by finding 10 reasons why something will not work instead of finding one reason why it will work. It is why we constantly say “Yes! But… ” The challenge at that point is to stop your head from starting the dreaded negative downward spiral… “what if it doesn’t work… then I’ll fail… what will everyone think… blah, blah, blah… waaaahhh, wwwaaahhhhh… pity party for me… OK, so this is not the most compassionate way to describe it, but it happens to be the most accurate.
The next time you find yourself starting to spiral in your mind, picture this: your thoughts are water going down the drain in a bathtub. Of course, as you add more thoughts, the water begins to spiral faster and faster and faster. As soon as you realize you are doing this, reach your hand out in front of you and push up the drain stopper. STOP the spiral. Then immediately reach out and turn on the water, filling the tub again.
It may seem trite, but do it once or twice. The very action of shutting off the spiral and filling the void that you have just created will start to become your default. When you realize the amount of time and energy you waste creating your own stress, it is mind-boggling. Think about it… if you could stop creating some of the stress you create for yourself, how instantly refreshing would that be? You have much more control over it than you are telling yourself!
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Source by Robin Sacks